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Alex Blair · Mar 31, 2026 · 8 min read

Too Tired to Cook

Hello. I’m Alex, and I wrote a cookbook for the days when everything is too much. I’m a cook, a home preserver, and an award-winning marmalade maker living in rural Spain with my partner Matt and four very opinionated rescue dogs. I love food. I love feeding people. I love the ritual of a proper meal made with care and time.
I also live with chronic illness and fatigue, which means that some days, the energy simply isn’t there, no matter how much I want it to be. I know what it’s like to want to cook and have nothing in the tank. And I know what it’s like to lose someone.
I was in the final stages of finishing this book when my father died. Everything stopped. The writing, the testing, the whole project, all of it ground to a halt while I tried to figure out how to exist inside grief. And during that time, like everyone who is grieving, I still had to eat. I still had to feed myself three times a day while my world had completely changed shape.
That experience is woven into every page of this book. I didn’t write it from the outside looking in.

About the Book Too Tired to Cook is 154 recipes organized not by ingredient or occasion, but by how much energy they need from you.
Every recipe has a spoon level, borrowed from Spoon Theory, the framework many people in chronic illness and disability communities use to describe their available energy. A one-spoon recipe needs almost nothing from you. A few ingredients, minimal steps, very little washing up. A three-spoon recipe is still straightforward, just a little more involved for the days when you have a little more to give.
Every recipe also has an Extra Tired Day tip. A shortcut, a swap, a way to make it even simpler when things are harder than usual.
There are no long stories to scroll past to find the ingredients. No lifestyle photography requiring you to feel bad about your kitchen. Just food, clearly laid out, organized around your capacity rather than anyone else’s expectations.

For Carers, Specifically I want to say something directly to anyone reading this who is caring for someone else.
You are allowed to eat. You are allowed to prioritize feeding yourself even when every spare moment feels like it should go to the person you’re looking after. A meal that takes ten minutes and uses four ingredients is not a failure. It is how you stay standing.
So many of the recipes in this book came from thinking about exactly that. The carer who hasn’t sat down since 7am. The person who has been at a hospital bedside all day comes home to an empty fridge and no energy to think; the people who are keeping someone else alive and quietly forgetting to keep themselves going, too.

For People in Grief Grief is exhausting in a way that is almost impossible to explain to anyone who hasn’t been inside it. It changes your appetite, your routine, your relationship with the kitchen you used to share with someone, or the meals you used to cook for them, or the food they used to make for you.
This book won’t fix any of that. But it might mean that on the days when you can barely function, you can still have something warm and real to eat. And sometimes that is enough.

Where to Find the Book Too Tired to Cook is available now at books.by/Alex-Blair or right here on The Carefullist under books. You can read a free excerpt at bit.ly/4rwABhk before you buy
Exclusive Recipes for The Carefullist These two recipes are written exclusively for carefullist.com and won’t appear anywhere else. They’re taken from the same format used throughout Too Tired to Cook, with a spoon level, a budget rating, and an Extra Tired Day tip at the end. One is bold and a little celebratory. The other is quiet and restorative. Between them, they cover a lot of ground.

Shakshuka for One Eggs baked in spiced tomato sauce 💠💠💠 €€ This is one of those meals that feels like it’s doing something for you while you eat it. It works for breakfast, lunch, or dinner; it’s naturally gluten-free, and with the feta and tahini yogurt drizzle, it’s fancy enough for a date night sharing plate with some warm pita. Scale it up easily by using a bigger pan.
You’ll need 1 tin chopped tomatoes (15 oz can) 1 tsp cumin or smoked paprika (or both) Salt and pepper 2 eggs Olive oil
If you have it Half an onion, diced, or 1 tsp onion powder, or a handful of crispy fried onions 1 clove garlic, minced, or ½ tsp garlic powder A pinch of chili flakes 50g (2oz) feta, crumbled
For the tahini yogurt drizzle 2 tbsp plain yogurt 1 tbsp tahini ½ tsp garlic powder A squeeze of lemon juice A splash of water to loosen
To serve Warm pita or crusty bread What to do Warm a small frying pan over a medium heat and add a glug of olive oil. If you’re using fresh onion, cook it gently for five minutes until soft. If you’re using onion powder or crispy fried onions, add them straight to the pan with the spices and stir for a minute. Add the chopped tomatoes and stir everything together. Season well with salt and pepper. Let it bubble gently for five minutes until it thickens slightly. If you’re using feta, crumble it over the sauce now. Make two small wells in the sauce and crack an egg into each one. Put a lid on the pan (a baking tray works fine if you don’t have one) and cook for four to six minutes, until the whites are set but the yolks are still a little soft. Keep an eye on it. It goes from perfect to overcooked quickly. While the eggs are cooking, stir together the yogurt, tahini, garlic powder, and lemon juice. Add a splash of water until it’s drizzleable. Drizzle the yogurt over the pan, scatter over a pinch of chili flakes if you like, and take it straight to the table with your bread. Extra Tired Day Tip Skip the fresh onion and garlic entirely and use powders or crispy fried onions instead. If you can find canned ratatouille or pisto, use that in place of the chopped tomatoes and spices and go straight to adding the eggs. Just as good, and barely any effort at all.

Chicken and Rice Soup A gentle, restorative bowl made from what you have 💠💠💠 €€ This is the soup you make when you need looking after. It asks very little of you, uses up what’s in the fridge, and tastes like someone made it with care. Use leftover roast chicken, a rotisserie chicken from the supermarket, or any cooked chicken you have. The rice cooks right in the broth, and almost any vegetables you have lurking in the fridge drawer will work here. This makes enough for two, so eat half tonight and put the rest in the fridge. Tomorrow you’ll have a ready-made hug in a mug waiting for you. Just reheat gently. You’ll need 150g (5oz) cooked chicken, shredded or roughly chopped 1 litre (4 cups) hot water 2 good-quality stock cubes (chicken) 60g (heaping ⅓ cup) long grain rice Salt and pepper A little oil or butter
If you have it Half an onion, diced 1 clove garlic, minced Any vegetables from the fridge: carrot, celery, courgette, leek, peas, spinach A bay leaf and a sprig of thyme A squeeze of lemon juice to finish Broken spaghetti or small pasta instead of rice
What to do If you’re using fresh onion, warm a little oil or butter in a saucepan over a medium heat and cook the onion gently for five minutes until soft. Add the garlic and any harder vegetables like carrot or celery and cook for another two or three minutes.
If you’re skipping the fresh onion, just go straight to the next step.
Dissolve both stock cubes in the hot water and pour it into the pan. Add the rice, the bay leaf and thyme if you have them, and bring everything to a gentle simmer. Cook for fifteen minutes, stirring occasionally, until the rice is tender.
Add the shredded chicken and any softer vegetables like courgette, peas or spinach. Simmer for another three to four minutes until everything is warmed through. Taste and season well with salt and pepper. A squeeze of lemon juice at the end lifts the whole thing.
Extra Tired Day Tip Skip the fresh vegetables entirely and use just the chicken, stock, and rice. A handful of frozen mixed vegetables stirred in at the end saves any chopping and counts as looking after yourself. If you have a microwave pouch of rice, stir it in right at the end instead and save yourself the 15-minute simmer. Tomorrow’s portion is already done. That’s a win.
Too Tired to Cook is available now at books.by/Alex-Blair or right here on The Carefullist under books. You can read a free excerpt at bit.ly/4rwABhk before you buy! Alex Blair Chef, Caterer, Chronic Illness Warrior, Author Threads: @the_big_gay_foodie
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